Sunday, May 12, 2013

unknowingly it began


what makes me feel upside down?
it was the tall orders that i placed, believing that it would all fall in place.
i didnt mind the nitty bitty.

but i can't instill my own world of logics onto others.

then i thought for a moment.. hesitating comes deep within, because there are unforeseen future that u may not know what u might say, might just change the whole thing.

because there was this long period of time that if i hesitated and not speaking up, it made things a little better.
well till now actually. it made me bottle up all of my heart wrenching questions or remarks. it was killing me inside of course. but the irony of human is when u chose for me to verbalize it but yet u failed to see or feel how i felt, too often the other flies into a denial mode.

it made me re-think and re-think of how easy and fake a good conversation can flow if one means nothing to you. so why is it hard to communicate with one that means something to you?

well logically, one will be naturally be afraid of losing the one that mean something.

maybe a unbreakable curse that binds a promise with the seal of life of the other would be an excellent invention.

-feel me deeper, even deeper and that is where your answer lies.

JNZL

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