thanks to those who wans an update of my life.

I would like to say thank you to those who read my blog just so tht u can know what's going on in my life, want an update of what i'm feeling.

even though u may not leave a msg on the tagboard, however thank you cause u cared!
some may just visit for the sake of wastin time but its ok.

i just realise that people usually rely on blogs to know what's happening. tht's rather true even for bestfriends!i just got to realise this fact through D and B blogs.

it's like a way of expressing myself if u dun feel like telling ppl over and over again or u just simply dun have the courage to say it out or not sure if you shld call tht particular person to pour out ur sorrows.

or just the simple fact that you don't know who the hell to call upon.
blogging is a really good way to express yourself, which is also why the name of the blog, the unexpressed.

well, adios my friends. GP lesson is over.
If my life is filled with laughters, would yours' be in mine?



JNZL

ss501

all of them are my fav songs. i love young saeng!!
the male lead which sings most of the lyrics!! omgosh i listen to the last video for abt 4000000X i am so in love with this grp called ss501!
JNZL

these few days i kept thinking. i kept wondering .
i kept pondering over some gruesome facts which makes my body twitch.

tht's why i seldom blog.
excuses i have been giving to people are quite rubbish.to cover up my mess.

i lied to my teacher, i lied to my mates, i dun even know how to face those teachers when they confront me on monday demading to know why the hell i never attend those lects.

for me, i just wanted to shut the shit world out. like really OUT.
the phone calls and smses just won't let go of me.

i think, i hav a record of sj, cal, SX plus glenn calling me on the same day just to ask me out for bowling.

i wanted to go so much. but my head just want to have some alone time to let myself rot to the bottom of the pit.

i can imagine the convo they had. like "eh u call her la."haha.
it must be the trauma that those papers left me.

i am pretty freaked out that yes! i didn't attend those post-morterm lects.
which is going through of ans.

I AM SO SORRY. and yes. i SKIPPED phys SRP too.i am sorry too.
i was too overwhelmed.

T-T
------------------------------------------------

let me think alright?!

the future seem so full of sunshine. but wait a sec, why won't the eclipse so away?
why is it tht i can't see myself anymore.

what is happening?
determination.discipline.decision.

i have the will to fight.
how abt this ppl.

i shall do my work diligently in the tampines lib and never go home before its done.
sounds good?

i am going to buy the yoga mat. not for doing yoga.



fear may strike the heart and conscience a million times,
but the truth is, unless you cried, you'll never truly understand the meaning of the word F-E-A-R.

REMEMBER.CONSTANT FEAR IS REQUIRED TO GET THINGS DONE THE HARD WAY.

but wait.
arn't we suppose to overcome our fears?

i told you this is an oxymoron world.
I TOLD YOU SO.

JNZL

hopeless

among these3 exam papers , maths left me feeling like i am a down right piece of shit.
so far, i never had this feeling before in my whole J2 life.

when i looked at the qns, they looked right back and me, as though they were trying to tell me: hey! why don't u know how to do us?"it keeps repeating in my head.
why don't i know how to do you??!!!

after i finished the paper and confirmed with Mr Gan a qn that makes me once again confirm that i really suck big time.

YOU CANNOT INTEGRATE square root(1-x^2) DUMB!
i spent 40 mins on the two qns thinking how the hell can i integrate it.

i feel like screaming out.i walked out of the exam room knowing that its O-V-E-R.
STUPID!

i have decided to dedicate all my year2 life into mugging.
i have decided to be a true MJ-cian.

come on scold me dumb or how obvious the outcome could get.
but i dun get it.i did revise for 3 days by doing qns.

tht's it. i am too distracted. tht's why all the vital info leaked out.
fuck you joey. what a fucked up morning.

JNZL

MBT

the whole week was, tys, notes, tys, notes.

finally i gave up and slipped back to my bed for the last two days and enjoy the dvds till wee hrs like 6am when i was supposed to do work.

econs today was a killer.
i think almost 4 out of 5 ppl did not do that ten marks qn.
it was: discuss how do economist analyze which industry is best for the society[10 marks]

my eyeballs rolled over and i just skipped and still had loads of time to attempt tht qn.
somehow, instinct tell me i'm in deep shit.

i am going to rest my head for like 20 mins, cause i had a total insomnia last night as i was so scared.i toss and turn till 4am. woke up at 7am.
the actual time of sleeping was 3am.=_=

yeah. tht suck!
i think i will have sleepless night for another 3 days.
i feel like i am like boxy @ sec4, everytime say can't sleep.

when u get all charged up, make sure it lasts.

JNZL

mac again

dear ppl, i am here to introduce to you the

NEWEST PRODUCT OF APPLE.

The first music player that talks to you.

the newest apple shuffle with 4gb and it has a voice control.

trust me. its so cool, i can't wait to earn money and get one.

i am really a mac supporter once i got my itouch.
i got into this web of "apple rulez my world "

something like that. i find all their videos very professional unlike stupid windows.

i am currently considering to buy an imac by june.
i have finally used up 3hrs of my time researching on this imac.

i was worried abt its compatibility on windows
and yes sufi. i finally agreed with u tht if i have windows integrated in my com, i will need to have those stupid anti-virus stuffs.cause

it will 100% AFFECT MY LOVELY IMAC

anw, here's the catch.
i figure it out that i may not need to install windows into my com, cause iworks(a product of mac for word docs and stuffs) are fully compatible with microsoft words.3


---------------------------------------------------------------

SUFI READ THIS! =)
imac or any other new apple comp have this software called the bootcamp.

the stupid salesman apparently really dunno his stuffs to the max cause you DON'T need to install PARALLELS v4.0 when u have bootcamp which is integrated in the imac.

BUT!! u will need to purchase a windows XP SP2 software which costs like $170++, to start windows.

apparently, bootcamp is a better and newer application compared to parallel as parallel is a company of its own! so yeah and 3 cheers to apple!!
----------------------------------------------------

so yeah. tht's abt it.
and i discovered FREAKING loads of cool stuffs abt the new leopard and i am definetly going to get it. no matter wad!

SO HERE'S THE CATCH
shld i buy the 24inch imac or shld i get the macbook

both have the same apps -.-
but i really really really like imac cause of the uber big screen which can totally blow me away to mt Everest.
ok tht's lame.
but u get the idea.

so comments pls!!!!

JNZL

believe

so why stop believing when the going gets tough..
why give up who you are because someone doesn't agree..
why not just stand on your own two feet and do what you feel is best..
if you lose your ability to believe then what do you have left?

We must have vision to see our potential, And faith to believe that we can; Then courage to act with conviction,to be who we are meant to be.

i choose to believe one more time that no obstacles are too big and no notes i can't conquer.
this is spartan!
JNZL

blonde

TODAY IS MY BLONDIE DAY.

every actions of mine show it all.
i bet 1 euro that mr Lye agrees 10, 000% with me due to all those stupid rash actions that cause troubles to ppl.

when meeting Mr Patrick, i was thinking abt WHAT WAS I THINKING when i commit the offense.i wasn't even listening to him talking to me, cause i felt no need to even listen.

i just nod and stare/stone at his watch and his gold ring.
i dun even bother stating my point. cause it will only drag time and i dun want to waste time listening to ppl lecturing me when i dun even give a dam.

maybe i am just sick and tired of following rules after rules.
maybe i just want to wreck havoc and i feel so sorry for mr lye to get all of it.
come to think of it, everything tht he says tht i shld be feeling guilty or pai sei of, i feel happy and normal that it happened.

maybe i am just too thick-skin.
so when he asked me if i felt guilty, i wouldn't bother arguing and just nod my head.act as though i feel guilty of what I've done.
i felt so happy when he called my hse phone to wake me up. what the crap man, am i still human? -.-

this feeling is so diff. i felt more at ease with mr cia ard, being able to BE MYSELF, and tell him my honest opinions and because he understands, tht's why i BOTHERED. -.-

------------------------------------------------------------
went out with sy jia and calvin to queenstown.

they must have think how blonde i am.
i must have made a zillion mockery out of myself.tht is probably why shun xiong and others keep mocking at me.

i'm dam sad la. no one bothers to shield me when someone mock at me.
oh well, i think i am the joke.

--------------------------------------------
creating more batman movies. ( cause will hav more jokers)-calvin
=.= =.= =.=

TWILIGHT DVD IS OUT!!
i'm sooo going to buy frm the most expensive dvd shop HVM.
i love you edward!!! and dr cullen. say tht i'm far beyond cure of going mad over him.
i dun care, cause the character is too real. HAHA

i think i am the opposite of pedophile. and i shld stop oggling my eyeballs out at them.
or else everybody will think that i fa hua chi to the extreme.

its fucking 3am now and i am still here.
shit.stupid blonde. wait. why am i scolding myself again?


JNZL(BLONDE)



my idea of our future in 2019. =)
taken frm zy blog. =))

TODAY IS CREATIVE DAY!!

i spent 30 mins choosing all those crystals design and all that. I was also deciding what theme shld i use?

-.- it all started when i decided to change my itouch cover to an arcylic cover. then it looked too plain to me and i decided to do some design with crystals

with inspiration frm alicia's HP. hahaha =))

so to de-stress, i spent more than $8 on those crystals.

as u can see, these crystals come in individual crystal. so i slowly, one by one paste it on my itouch new cover which cost like $10 (-.-)

i spent more than an hour pasting. my head gt giddy frm looking down for too long.

but its worth it. I LOVE THE DESIGN!!

anw, this is custom made so its special!

when my future seems so bleak. i am glad that ppl ard me still hav faith in me.

for that, i love you.

JNZL

all emotions

when will edward ever bite me so that i can finally enjoy the life when forever seems forever.
i'm missing ming en.

i am only a glass sheet away from flying.
please be my window to shield me.
after reading a few blogs tonight, i am feeling all sorts of emotions.

i read m.e blog, and i felt out of place.i felt so wrong and i felt so unfair and that i deserve more than what i have now.

i read S and A blog and i felt that love can really be haunting.
scary but worth the experience. do we need to go through all those heart-breaks before someone understand one's mistakes?

unfortunately , the answer is YES
and guess what people, you can do no shit about it.

then i proceed to read J blog, and found out that life can seem so complicated when its so simple.
and also, love is some sort of universal language that even photos are capable of oozing out love.

during the process of reading SJ's blog, i have also come in terms that one person words can be so easily remembered . I've learned that those little things you said may somehow change the person's life by a little.

i think i changed quite a few.

lastly, i went to capt's blog and realized how lame can he get ,by linking up all those ball names into a sentence.


JNZL