weird things happen

my face was totally si bei like this when i saw some things off the internet. ok to put it simply, i used facebook for its sole purpose. STALKING.

lol funny tht i stalk? nah, its common just tht ppl dont tell you only.
so i stalked my nemesis sis which i came across as SHOCKING. haha! who ever knew tht such things cld happen?

it makes me realise deeper when i continue to stalk more ppl .
many things really ACTUALLY HAPPEN. and people ard them will be like omg how come he/she so dam lucky. DID HE/SHE SAVE A NATION IN HER PREV LIFE?

lol but i am sure there are not many nations which can be continuously saved and i dont think nations are always in deep shit. like from my childhood right i only know hua mu lan and those high and mighty warriors and kings tht save nations.

so it all boils down to luck? and its just a sign the world is trying so hard to tell us, these are not miracles but in fact unbelievable things which are in your favour can happen to you too.
like maybe i wld think that i can nv ever find a guy to my liking which likes me back (mostimpt lol) may actually happen.

but u nv know what may happen in your future. so work hard now and just let life screw u up or bring you to the highest cloud. well of course many dont wish for screw ups but sometimes screw ups in life made you a better person.

well of course it only happens if u allow tht lesson/ experience to enrich urself and not wallow in it .
like i came to understand more about ............myself, like more about how ppl work.
sort of things.

BUT OF COURSE I WOULD PREFER IF I CAN ALWAYS CONTACT THE PERSON , U KNOW.

like i know i can survive. PLEASE LA WHO CANNOT. BUT.
i would be in a much much more comfortable position and be at ease when i can contact the person freq or as and when i want to contact la . AND OF COURSE IT WLD BE BEST IF THE PERSON REPLIES.

duh.. i wld look like some idiot who keeps spamming bo liao msgs and no one reply me right. like some pathetic shit like tht. been feeling this way for 2 days in a row now. =(

i am a human, i need companionship ma. so even if its a short reply i also happy wad. not as if i intend to have a long convo like tht.

SO ANYWHORE, i am feeling quite out of the norm for 2 days and i skipped sch. YES I DID IT. tsk. i am trying to control myself to be consistent. btw this is my 1st time hor.

i realised it was because i lack communication and when i msg , i got no reply. tutees dont count pls. parents of tutee of course dont count. tweets dont count too. i call also nv get to have a nice chat.

SEE I LIKE SOME CMI PATHETIC SHIT RIGHT. knn. like beggar sia.
tsk. i feel horrible abt myself too but i am only human and this is my flaw. i need to be reassured every time that you will always be there for me when u can ma. i just feels like being abandoned. YOU DONT UNDERSTAND LOR.

so i am so down tht i decided to skip sch and regretted it 2 hrs later because i am a changed person ok. I KAN CHIONG CAUSE I NV ATTEND LECTURE. i wished i cld teleport to sch straight away.

BUT AS I SAID I WAS FEELING OUT OF THE NORM.

so i really really hope ppl ard me can msg me more so tht i feel loved and like ppl are actually concerned abt me.

TSK CANT BELIEVE MY BODY AND BRAIN WAS SO BLOODY UNIFIED to really not study all the way. i think i am a person of extremes. but as i said. I WAS FEELING OUT OF THE NORM. wa piang i think i said this like 8 times? ai ya wadever u get the point.

so i was also feeling awkward. OH BTW I KNOW HOW TO SPELL AWKWARD ALRDY yay. i always had trouble typing it and instead i just replaced it with weird instead , because iphone also cannot help me correct it. embarrassed i also learning to remember how to spell it.lol kns the iphone always auto correct it to embraced. -__-ll
because i suddenly changed myself to be a super efficient person i felt really awkward when ppl promise me to do things and in the end nv do it at the deadline they promised and i had to make up false situation so as to look normal, to get things done.

LIKE I CANNOT TELL HER THAT ITS BECAUSE YOU SAID YOU WOULD DO IT AT BLABLABLA TIME AND THEN YOU NEVER DO IT. AND WHY CANT U DO IT SINCE U ARE ALRDY AT YOUR COMPUTER AND I REALLY WANT TO GET THIS OVER AND DONE WITH. AND IF YOU CANNOT DO IT BY THEN , YOU SHLD NOT HAVE SAID U CLD WHAT.

so this is what i wanted to say, but of course ,because i am an adult i had to say things like
: oh its not because i want it urgently but because xxx is chasing me so therefore i hope you wld do it quickly preferably by tonight. and when the person still fails to comply

i said: oh its been 2 days alrdy, xxx is chasing me again and its quite bad , get it done by tonight kay.
and I DONT KNOW HOW TO SAY THAT ITS NOT I KAN CHIONG BUT THERE ARE REASONS FOR ME TO WANT IT URGENTLY.

AND WHAT'S WITH THE ATTITUDE THT U ARE GIVING ME WHEN U ARE SUPPOSED TO SAY SORRY.

so yar. other things too like i would WANT TO NORMALLY SAY: I KNOW RIGHT, HAHAHA I KNOW WHY U ALSO WANT TO DO THIS. JUST NOW U SAY U DONT WANT THEN WHEN I WENT AHEAD WITH THE PLAN U THINK U MIGHT BE LEFT BEHIND RIGHT. ai ya dont shy la! just admit! hahaha

BUT. i cannot say it out because its too blunt. (see i learn) even though, to me its just honesty and totally not insulting you if you wanna copy me .
 LIKE ITS NOT A SIN TO COPY THE RIGHT THINGS WAD.

 but ppl wld think otherwise and think i am arrogant and BHB and will be like : who do u think you are.

ai ya some ppl pride themselves too high ma. SO even close friends also cannot do it.

ONLY ONE PERSON which i have no restrain because i know that he knows that i totally mean no harm. like it is just a joke. tht wld be sufian lor.

either that it would be i really DONT GIVE A SHIT ABT YOU.

seriously but prob i will stop the religion / race jokes because seems like he cant take tht.

BUT, for others , i dont think they are able to realise that i have no bad intention for friends and i NEVER EVER WANT TO COMPARE MYSELF WITH THEM. please hor , friends dont compare each other, dun want to outdo each other dont want to compete with each other.

LIKE , does it really matter? friends shld be happy for each other when one gets the better. u get what i mean. maybe its only me that thinks this way. tsk tsk my friends and close friends are also quite complex. so i dont think they are able to accept my straightforwardness.well, tht ends my long ranting.

lol can u believe it, i type until my right hand numb.
so i need more msg and care and concern! =(

for a laughing picture , i came across it when i was searching for "surprised' pics.

and i found this. A BLOW UP DOLL . lol i think its funny.

LIKE WHUT?! IT LOOKS SO SCARY! HOW THE HELL ARE U GOING TO PUT UR **** in it?
i wld be scared and get nightmares pls. as in JUST LOOK AT IT. does it even look right. =___=
JNZL