figure 1.2
fig 1.1My dear ex-best friend.
looking now at your life and my life , looking back at OUR past. everything seems like it was linked and fated in one way or another.
you could have had him. i could have lost him. i could have lost both of you.
but reality stands tht the fact.tht i lost you but gained him.
dear (w), life is cruel as it seems, it was never fair for me in the past nor is it fair right now.
the reason i heard from s and zy why we broke up is because i didn't tell u anything abt myself.
now dear (w) , do you know that all these while i have been trying to tell u abt myself when we were together. but the response i got was a little cold and by you looking left and right made me feel so insecure , made me feel so unwanted.
as our misunderstanding in each other nv resolve as we didn't talk it out. slience pierced through both of us. the cold war started and everything ended just like a tragic ending you would see in dramas. but dear lovely friend. the drama happened to us as time everything passes us too fast tht we can't catch hold of a moment to breathe and understand each other.
i cried till my eyes were swollen when you left. it lingers as a wound in my heart and this barrier i hav set with all my friends, not allowing them near me as i am afraid i would get hurt. tht is why i am lonely. i am not as brave as u think i maybe. all those times in mjc i have suffered with my classmates and the reasons is because i eat in class and sleep. tht's why they hate me, or rather so.
why don't you be in my place. my family is broken, childhood scars are all over me. tht's why i may seem mature, partly due to the numerous misery i had in my life.
if i could write a story of my life, people would cry halfway. people would think i am so CMI. ppl would think tht life is too unfair for me. but do i ask for it?
being given birth to this world, firstly ppl smile. then they frown , they torture me inside out leaving me in the open with scars inflicted in every inch of my mind and heart.and you my dear friend hurt me in everyway. though u didn't know. i was crying. i was crying. please remember , i treated you like as though u are the only one who could make me smile.u may not know, but right now i am telling u. i held you high above anyone else. tht's why when u left me, i was lost; in despair ; shocked ; heart-broken ;mental breakage and felt like there is completely no one in this earth whom i can trust and believe and love. you may not know how i cried and cried till wee hrs whenever i thought of you. till this very fateful day, i still cry whenever i remembered i lost you.
it has been 2 years my love.and i am still crying. Did you even know? ppl who don't know me may think i am insociable. but i am just one lost kid who can't tear down the solid bricks with cememnt that i bulid with my own bare hands to once again trust . i can't (w). i just can't.
ppl thinks i am weak. i know i am. dear friend. have you ever felt so horrified when you realise i left you? were u thinking i am just one stupid bitch who like guys over my lovely friend? 2 yrs my love. it has been 2years. 3.5yrs to be more exact.
what am i suppose to do. if anyone were to leave me right now. i would go into a state of depression and might never climb back again. you have lovely friends in jc. i have none. no one in my stupid class bothers abt me. even if i died it's just less one person paying money to the treasurer.
i don't blame you for still liking him. but i want to ask. what would you do if you were to see me once more appearing infront of you with eyes tht shows nth but pain and sorrow and a body which moves due to the brain and discover tht joey is now almost nth but an empty shell with the soul of her cheerful spirit gone with the years.would you pity me? would you beg me to return him to you? would you say a word of sorry for all these while? what would you do my darling.
he treats you well. seriously. i didn't know you and him went to the airport and even watched him played soccer. i didn't know. because he didn't tell. to him it may be trivia matters but, to me when it involves you. i am still concern. i am trying my best to still like you. but why did you broke the trust. why must all these be in a triangle ? who will benefit? all will be losers.
humans are selfish. i can now announce that i am not selfish.i am not. even if an enemy would to call to ask me rush down to comfort the person i would. because i can't bear to see another person to turned out to be me. i am almost a tragic . almost incurable. but there is hope. if only u could talk to me. if only we were close once more. if only i could stand up from where i fall. then , i will be rescued.
looking now at your life and my life , looking back at OUR past. everything seems like it was linked and fated in one way or another.
you could have had him. i could have lost him. i could have lost both of you.
but reality stands tht the fact.tht i lost you but gained him.
dear (w), life is cruel as it seems, it was never fair for me in the past nor is it fair right now.
the reason i heard from s and zy why we broke up is because i didn't tell u anything abt myself.
now dear (w) , do you know that all these while i have been trying to tell u abt myself when we were together. but the response i got was a little cold and by you looking left and right made me feel so insecure , made me feel so unwanted.
as our misunderstanding in each other nv resolve as we didn't talk it out. slience pierced through both of us. the cold war started and everything ended just like a tragic ending you would see in dramas. but dear lovely friend. the drama happened to us as time everything passes us too fast tht we can't catch hold of a moment to breathe and understand each other.
i cried till my eyes were swollen when you left. it lingers as a wound in my heart and this barrier i hav set with all my friends, not allowing them near me as i am afraid i would get hurt. tht is why i am lonely. i am not as brave as u think i maybe. all those times in mjc i have suffered with my classmates and the reasons is because i eat in class and sleep. tht's why they hate me, or rather so.
why don't you be in my place. my family is broken, childhood scars are all over me. tht's why i may seem mature, partly due to the numerous misery i had in my life.
if i could write a story of my life, people would cry halfway. people would think i am so CMI. ppl would think tht life is too unfair for me. but do i ask for it?
being given birth to this world, firstly ppl smile. then they frown , they torture me inside out leaving me in the open with scars inflicted in every inch of my mind and heart.and you my dear friend hurt me in everyway. though u didn't know. i was crying. i was crying. please remember , i treated you like as though u are the only one who could make me smile.u may not know, but right now i am telling u. i held you high above anyone else. tht's why when u left me, i was lost; in despair ; shocked ; heart-broken ;mental breakage and felt like there is completely no one in this earth whom i can trust and believe and love. you may not know how i cried and cried till wee hrs whenever i thought of you. till this very fateful day, i still cry whenever i remembered i lost you.
it has been 2 years my love.and i am still crying. Did you even know? ppl who don't know me may think i am insociable. but i am just one lost kid who can't tear down the solid bricks with cememnt that i bulid with my own bare hands to once again trust . i can't (w). i just can't.
ppl thinks i am weak. i know i am. dear friend. have you ever felt so horrified when you realise i left you? were u thinking i am just one stupid bitch who like guys over my lovely friend? 2 yrs my love. it has been 2years. 3.5yrs to be more exact.
what am i suppose to do. if anyone were to leave me right now. i would go into a state of depression and might never climb back again. you have lovely friends in jc. i have none. no one in my stupid class bothers abt me. even if i died it's just less one person paying money to the treasurer.
i don't blame you for still liking him. but i want to ask. what would you do if you were to see me once more appearing infront of you with eyes tht shows nth but pain and sorrow and a body which moves due to the brain and discover tht joey is now almost nth but an empty shell with the soul of her cheerful spirit gone with the years.would you pity me? would you beg me to return him to you? would you say a word of sorry for all these while? what would you do my darling.
he treats you well. seriously. i didn't know you and him went to the airport and even watched him played soccer. i didn't know. because he didn't tell. to him it may be trivia matters but, to me when it involves you. i am still concern. i am trying my best to still like you. but why did you broke the trust. why must all these be in a triangle ? who will benefit? all will be losers.
humans are selfish. i can now announce that i am not selfish.i am not. even if an enemy would to call to ask me rush down to comfort the person i would. because i can't bear to see another person to turned out to be me. i am almost a tragic . almost incurable. but there is hope. if only u could talk to me. if only we were close once more. if only i could stand up from where i fall. then , i will be rescued.
refer to fig(1.1)
but will you rescue me? the decision lies in your hands.
you have the ability to kill me or you can save me.
you decied. lastwords. you were once my all , my sky .but with a twist of fates we fell apart as weaklings once more.
jnzl
but will you rescue me? the decision lies in your hands.
you have the ability to kill me or you can save me.
you decied. lastwords. you were once my all , my sky .but with a twist of fates we fell apart as weaklings once more.
jnzl
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